Author: Bill Kirkwood

Don’t bash my Bride!

Posted on by Bill Kirkwood

The following is a fictitious story…

My brother wrote on FB the other night: “My brother’s wife is a lying hypocritical cheat. She says she loves him more than anyone else but if she had to choose between her “stuff” and her husband she’d ditch him in a sec. She says she wants to be generous to others with their money but she spends it all on herself. I love her as my sister-in-law, but I’m hoping by calling her out like this that she’ll see what she’s doing and change.”

After the initial shock led to deeper shock and anger I called my brother. Not a pretty confrontation. I told him I knew there were problems but that I loved my wife more than anyone else. She is my lovely bride of more than 25 years. I said I know there are struggles in our marriage and that we are working on them. Calling her out on FB was not going to help her change. It only aggravates the issues. Many of the actions he attributed to her happened years ago. To his credit, when he first became aware of her attitudes he worked within our family to help her. We had quite a few conversations around the dining room table. Understandably she got upset, but in the end she began to understand and listen. But she did not change as fast as he wanted her to nor in the ways he thought she should change. Thus the FB rant.

Through the past few years, with counseling and open discussions between us, she is making some huge changes. And we’re growing closer together and more in love with each other every day.

****

End of fictitious story. A few questions about this story…

  • Why do some Christian brothers and sisters insist on trying to correct the Bride of Jesus by publicly slamming her for all her faults?
  • Do they really believe that by publicly writing scathing indictments, the Church, or a church, will really change?
  • Do they not think Jesus is perfectly aware of all Her faults yet loves her with everything He has anyway? Don’t they believe He has the power to bring about change in His Bride?
  • What does Jesus think of his brothers writing about His Bride in this way? I know how I feel, but what about Jesus?
  • Is there a role for an Old Testament-style prophet who declares the faults of the Church and God’s displeasure over them?
  • Or is the New Testament model of gentle shepherd more what Jesus desires for those who want to help His bride?

Mull it over and tell me what you think. I’ll give you my take later.

***Disclaimer: my real brother, Rich, would never EVER do anything like this, nor is my wife anything even remotely close to the story described above.

Are you pregnant?

Posted on by Bill Kirkwood

“Are you pregnant?” I still remember asking her the question and the incredulous response to a query I thought was a conversation opener, “No!” Ok so now where do we go? She thinks that I think she’s fat! That was the end of the conversation. And the last time I’ve EVER asked that question unless I was absolutely certain!

Are you pregnant? No, not with a baby. Are you pregnant with worship? You see, whenever I receive comments about the “worship music” in my church I always become very introspective of my role in that body.

I compare what I do to a delivery room. As in a hospital, people arrive here who are ready for something (at least that’s my hope.) They have spent the week growing as disciples, developing their life of worship. They get pregnant with worship! When they arrive, they’re ready to deliver. I’ve prepared my heart and prepared the worship leaders, the preacher is ready with God’s Word, but we cannot deliver something for which those who come are unprepared. If you’re not pregnant, you cannot deliver a baby. If you’re not developing your worship life outside of Sunday morning, you probably will not worship deeply here.

 My hope as a pastor of worship is that everyone will worship all the time. This can be singing in the car, studying the scripture at your table, helping in a soup kitchen. It can be in the grocery, fixing the sink, cutting the grass, studying chemistry. Then when we gather as the body of Christ on Sunday, we are all pregnant, and can all deliver a glorious celebration of God’s greatness.

 Are you pregnant today?

The New “Blended Worship”

Posted on by Bill Kirkwood

When I was looking for a full-time worship leading gig 10 years ago I told myself I would only work in a church that had always been “contemporary.” I did not want to handle the craziness of a church in transition from “traditional” (meaning organ, choir, hymns) to “contemporary” (meaning drums & guitars, new worship choruses or hymns arranged for band.) I avoided a church with two types of services where there was always a tension between the two. I also avoided the “blended” service with both organ/choir and band, where half the people were happy half the time

Riverwood was the perfect fit. Contemporary since the beginning, wide age range but everyone, young and old, knew what the music was like and chose to make this their church home, either because of the music or in spite of the music. Some came for the preaching and tolerated the music. Others liked the music more than the preaching. Still others actually liked both. And we all got along.

Just when I thought I avoided the worship wars of the 70’s and 80’s when “Jesus music” was rising, now I’m wondering if that change is happening again. “Contemporary” has always been a moving target. As styles change in culture so does contemporary music in church. A song that was contemporary 20 years ago is almost traditional now. A style that was cutting edge 10 years ago is now “retro.” While some churches are still “traditional traditional” (or TT) with hymns, organs & choirs attended by mostly seniors, more are what I call  “traditional contemporary” (TC) with newer songs played by 40+ year-old players/singers (like me!) appealing to a broader age range. Then there’s the “new contemporary,” (NC) with very edgy songs played by 20-somethings for other 20-30-somethings.

So now if you have a church of seniors & a few younger, do “TT.” If you want primarily 20-30’s, do “NC.” For the broader age range it seems you must have “TC.” Many churches solve this by offering several styles in different venues…an 8:30 TT, 10:00 TC and Saturday/Sunday night NC services. The congregation ends up segregated by style. Seems exactly where we were 20-30 years ago!

Here’s the question: is this TC style the new “blended” where half the people are happy half the time? Here’s why I ask…

I’ve always tried my best to pick songs with singable melodies, not-too-wide range and good theology. Many are heard on the radio so people who listen to Moody radio, The Fish or K-Love will be familiar with them. My goal is to pick songs that engage the hearts of the people and allow them to express the truths of the song to God. I also try to bridge the range of teen to senior citizen who attend the same service. But lately I hear comments from people about how they observe many people at my church not singing to the music that we’re doing. They should be participating by singing but they don’t. The seniors don’t seem to like the newer songs. The teens-20’s do. This Sunday we sang “Come Thou Fount Of Every Blessing.” My pastor & I were talking today about how, whenever we do a hymn arrangement, people seem to sing out more. Is it because of familiarity? Because the older members engage more? Or are hymns still the language of the vast majority of church-goers, young and old?

Anyway, I’d like your thoughts. I’m not looking for a pat on the back & a “You’re doing great, Bill.” This isn’t fishing for affirmation. I’d genuinely like to hear your thoughts on the ever-changing landscape of worship music.

  • What type of music helps you engage in worship?
  • Is inter-generational worship valuable with a mix of styles?
  • Or do you prefer your style with your own generation?
  • Do you worship to newer songs? Give me your favorite.
  • Is traditional contemporary the new blended, with all the pros/cons that go with it?

Thanks for helping me process all this.

Talk to me…

Bill